I'm confused.

After so many years of searching, I believe I'm still don't understand a lot of things in this world.
If I need to make a list, I believe the list will go on until I die.

The first question that I remember I asking myself is, "Why the bubble is in sphere shape?".
When is it I asking myself that question...ohh, I'm just 5 years old.
The second question that I remember I asking myself is, "How rainbow exist and why its existence important?".

Then...
What is the beyond the border or outside of my house?
Am I different compared to others?
Why am I able to do some thinking?
If each religions promoting peace, why are they fighting against each other?
If each religions promoting love, why are they fighting against homosexuals?
Where is our God?
Is there an absolute answer for everything?
Between black and white, is there any gray area?
Is there any parallel world?
Why do we exist?
If Herodotus, Plato, Aristotle, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Archimedes, Euclid, Bernhard Riemann and many others great scientists or mathematicians do not exist, how would our history changed?
If the apple was not falling on Isaac Newton's head, would the history changed?
How should we solve the mystery of our mind?
What is the mystery of Mathematics, Science, Logic, Creativity and Consciousness? What lies beyond?
What is the most ideal world?

...and many many more.

Some of the questions are indisputable and some are unattainable. For those unanswerable will be discarded.
Yet, we are keeping answer for our needs.
We are really one mysterious creature.

Activities and Communication

I'm taking three subjects this semester.
And I started to plan what to do for next semester project.

Perhaps I worry too much...
I totally lost all my mood to communicate with all the people around me.

Step 1: Enter Facebook, scroll down the list to find people to spam.

Nah, he is too busy...
oh that one, tak kenal dia pun...
why she on my friend list?...
why he didn't online???..
last time he didn't reply me...I'm not gonna talk to him again!
Ok, no mangsa for me to spam. 

Step 2: Close Facebook, open 9Gag.

Wow...that's funny post! I feels like want to comment...nah, too lazy...
Next post!
Next!
Next!
Next!
...
 That's all?
(All to lazy to comment)

Step 3: Close 9Gag, open Blog to find some interesting blogs...

Hmm..should I comment on this? I afraid I will hurt their feeling...will I?
I feels like want to attack this stupid fellow! Look at what he wrote!
She is damn funny...wait...not really...
Tak ada blog yang funny pun~

Step 4: Close Blog...check email..check Youtube.

Step 5: Lower my expectation and repeat Step 1 to 4 again.

That's pretty sum up all my activities...besides studying.

Sometimes, I really lazy to communicate with people because i) they have strange ideas ii) I don't know what he/she's talking about iii) we don't have the common 'key' or iv) I totally hate you.

And, I wonder why I have so less friends. -.-

The Animal School: A Fable

I read this piece of story in "7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey". It was written by Dr R.H Reeves. I want to share it, so people able to understand that school, college, and university are not the only place we can show our intelligence or talents.

Once upon a time the animals decided they must do something heroic to meet the problems of a “new world” so they organized a school. They had adopted an activity curriculum consisting of running, climbing, swimming and flying. To make it easier to administer the curriculum, all the animals took all the subjects.

The duck was excellent in swimming. In fact, better than his instructor. But he made only passing grades in flying and was very poor in running. Since he was slow in running, he had to stay after school and also drop swimming in order to practice running. This was kept up until his webbed feet were badly worn and he was only average in swimming. But average was acceptable in school so nobody worried about that, except the duck.

The rabbit started at the top of the class in running but had a nervous breakdown because of so much makeup work in swimming.

The squirrel was excellent in climbing until he developed frustration in the flying class where his teacher made him start from the ground up instead of the treetop down. He also developed a “charlie horse” from overexertion and then got a C in climbing and D in running.

The eagle was a problem child and was disciplined severely. In the climbing class, he beat all the others to the top of the tree but insisted on using his own way to get there.

At the end of the year, an abnormal eel that could swim exceeding well and also run, climb and fly a little had the highest average and was valedictorian.

The prairie dogs stayed out of school and fought the tax levy because the administration would not add digging and burrowing to the curriculum. They apprenticed their children to a badger and later joined the groundhogs and gophers to start a successful private school.

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
― Albert Einstein

1/3 Completed

So fast half of the year already gone.
I still got one more year to go!
Just finish 1st semester by taking 4 subjects,
but I already feel mentally breakdown not to mention the crying part.

This semester I took 4 subjects again. Probably.
All the subjects even tougher than the previous semester.
More assignments, more tutorials and more notes.

Then I need to decide what project to do and need to find supervisor.
Oh god, why?

Be patient, Vincent, be patient.
One more year, then I can shout to the world that I'm free.

Oyasuminasai.