Judge's Jolt

A divorce scene was getting rough and hot between husband and wife before the judge.

Wife argued fiercely, "Your honor I kept child in this womb for nine long months, brought baby out with pain and suffering, then whose baby it is?"

The judge looks at fuming husband and asked, "What do you have to say hubby?"

The husband thundered, "Your honor, if I insert a dollar in cola vending machine's hole and a can of cola drops, whose cola is it? Machine's or mine?

Wife would not accept this and replied, "Sir Judge, it was my bottle of milk and if some one injected his couple drops of yogurt maker mix then whose yogurt it is? Big milk-maker's or a small drop pusher's?

Husband replied, "Yes Judge but listen to me, when I pushed a letter in typewriter, jumped and danced hard pressing all the excitable keys to print the letter, then whose letter it is? Mine or typewriter's? 

Judge was loosing his brain and yelled... 

"You knucklehead instead of using typewriter if you had used your handwritten note, none of these would have happened."

Three-Kick-Rule

A big-city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick-Rule."

The lawyer asked, What is the Texas Three-Kick-Rule?."

The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on this belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "OK, you old coot! now, it's my turn."

(I love this part)

The old farmer smiled and said, "No I give up, you can have the duck."



When you are educated, you'll believe only half of what you hear.
When you're intelligent, you know which half.

Visit Z's house for Hari Raya

Z invited us to come over his house to celebrate Hari Raya. This is the third time I visited his house since 2009.

We came to his house at 3.00 pm. I bring along my homemade Hari Raya card and his super belated Birthday present. (See Here)

Then all of us seated and proceed to enjoy our meals.

They are very shy when I'm the one taking their photo when eating.

We talked about current news in Facebook, gossips, our future whether to further our studies or work, foods, and etc. (but none of us talking about finding relationships). Before we finished our meals, HS mentioned about how she afraid of oven or maybe microwave because scared it will explode.

HS is a great stalker. She stalked my wall and asked a lot of questions. She makes me looks so proud and sad. Don't stalk my wall leh.

I think I noticed that the food almost same like last year. I think I need to ask Z to change the menu next year...haha. Japanese food or Korean food? Haha...
 

After finishing our meals, we rest a while before photo taking session.
 

The pink shirt guy keeps playing with his iPhone and then PX's iPhone. Now Z also holding his iPhone. I should take out my iScold to play with them.

Our group photo. I know we looks so smart, handsome, beautiful, charming, gorgeous, attractive and lovely. We are Actuarial Science Student (ASS) after all.

But if you want to get headache, sleep less than 8 hours, insomnia, loss of appetite, bad mood and heart attack during quizzes, tests, exams, and assignments...you are welcome to join Actuarial Science. The door is always open for you.

The most important for Hari Raya is DUIT RAYA! 

ka-ching $.$

Thanks auntie!